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Is it fake to be positive?

February 17, 2014

Is it fake to be positive minded? Does it indicate someone fooling themselves that things are all rosy? Or is it in fact the negative minded people who are the fakers?

With many of an extreme positive nature. Always putting on a happy face. You do feel it is put on to hide from some dark truths about themselves and the world. But then positive energy can be infectious. And even if you are not feeling it inside yourself, it may help someone else to have a happier and better day if you act positively to them.

But herein lies the dilemma of degrees of fakeness. How much should we be willing to sacrifice our own feelings to help others feel better? When does it get to the stage that we are not being true to ourselves, and so are being fake?

I think it is very difficult to judge these things, and we all lie somewhere on a spectrum that is changing and moving around all the time from day to day. I am very much on the side of being true to yourself, over giving a pretense of positivity. So if I am feeling down or negative about something I will normally show it. But then, it is shown, not because I want this, that or the other reaction from other people. Just because I want to reflect my true inner feelings and not pretend to be positive about things when I am not feeling it inside.

I am sure, for many parents, they are in a position where they have to show positivity at times for the sake of their children. But this is quite normal, and is very different from showing positivity always to all your peers, friends and colleagues.

Is the world itself positive or negative? What is the truth of the world? I would say the world itself is neutral and has no opinion on the matter. It is different circumstances that come upon us from day to day that we react to in different ways and have to deal with in an appropriate and sincere way. Situations and circumstances create emotions in us that we need to learn to be aware of so we can handle them. It is our interaction with the situation that is all that is real.

When we try to deny our interaction, and our part in the affairs of our lives. When we look to play the victim or point the blame at forces out of our control, this is when we are in danger of becoming fake.

So, to summarise, I think both extreme positive and negative people make this mistake of being fake:

The extreme positive person is imagining they are always a parent and so have to be positive with everyone, but this is not the truth of their situation. It is a fake role they have taken upon themselves. The extreme negative person takes on the role of victim. Ignoring their own interactions with their surroundings as if they are irrelevant, and so misunderstanding themselves and their influence in their world.  Probably adopting some world view that another has told them, rather than trying to understand it, or look at it, for themselves.

The lesson to be learned is that we have to be aware of our immediately experienced world on all levels. Emotional, Intellectual, and Instinctual. No one can always avoid falling into traps of behaving, acting, and even thinking in a fake way. But you can be aware and see it developing to stop it early before it becomes an ingrained habit. For this latter is where bad karma can begin to build up.

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